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Does the world know the real you?Posted by Claude Warner on Tuesday 5th January 2010 at 14:43:47 The world could be described as the community where the human family lives. The question is, how do you live in this world? Who is the you that the world gets to know?
Is it the real you, where how you live on the outside is a reflection of you who are on the inside, where your interaction with your fellow “world” members is based on your willingness to be known as you are, regardless of what they might think about you, or of how what they think of you would make you feel?
Or, is the you that the world gets to know another you, worn over the top of the real you? Is it a you that you have created to please or impress this community? Is it a you that hides your fears, your vulnerability, your humanity even?
Is your statement in approaching the world “This is who I am?”, or is it “This is who I want you to think I am”, or even further down the spiral, is it “Who do you want me to be?”
Obviously the starting point is to know yourself, your values, your purpose, your strengths as well as your weaknesses; to know what makes you come alive.
If you are clear on this, then the next question then is to say “How I am going to show up in the world”?
Many of us don’t like ourselves, we are afraid that we are not good enough, smart enough, talented enough, strong enough, pretty enough, and so on.
Rather than risk being known for who we really are, we play it safe. We find a safe job, working for a safe company, making safe decisions. Some of us actually become very successful. We find something that we are good at, and from that skill we build our world.
There is nothing wrong in playing to your strengths; in fact I would encourage you to do so. The question here is motive. Are you successful at XYZ because that is what you really want to do, because you are motivated to do so, because it makes you come alive? If the answer is yes, then great, but if no, then you are not being authentic or real.
People can smell phony a mile off, even a well constructed one, and sooner or later your false self will be exposed. Even if you do manage to convince others that how they are experiencing you is the real deal, how do you feel on the inside? Do you feel good about yourself, or are you ashamed, which makes you feel even worse? How does this affect your capacity? Are you resilient, able to overcome life’s challenges from this place, or does it just get harder and harder?
Sooner or later you are likely to say to yourself on the inside, “Enough is enough, I want to be me. I want to do what makes my heart come alive, not what the world wants or expects”.
One of my defining statements has been “Ask not what the world needs, ask what makes you come alive. Go and do that, for what the world needs is more people who are fully alive”.
What makes you come alive? What would fire you up so much that you look forward to getting up in the morning, day after day? What would you want to do for the shear enjoyment of it, even if you didn’t get paid?
If you are able to answer that question, then what in the world are you waiting for?
The “world” (the collective of all the false selves in our community) does not celebrate real people; in fact it fears them, because every real person shows up all the other phonies. It will do all it can to pull you back down with statements like “Who do you think you are?”, “What makes you so special?”
But isn’t the freedom of your heart a prize worth fighting and risking for.
Isn’t it time for the world to get know the real you, to feel your “weight”.
There is a statement by St. Irenaeus which says that “The glory of God is many fully alive”.
Knowing the source, why settle for anything less?
Article also published on Selfgrowth.com Claude Warner is an Executive Coach specializing in Personal Leadership Development, which is the development of our personal leadership in order to be able to lead others more effectively in a business context.
Understanding the influence of our personal example, Personal Leadership Development coaching seeks to develop our ability to understand and manage our own emotions and our ability to relate to, understand and respond to other people and the situations within which we encounter them (Emotional Intelligence), our ability to find meaning and purpose from which we are inspired and motivated (Spiritual Intelligence), as well as our ability to think rationally, logically, critically, strategically, and systemically. (Thinking Intelligence or IQ). Claude’s coaching style is dynamic and shifts between a structured and systemic approach, and a relational and intuitive approach, informed by whichever approach best serves the clients' style and agenda. Claude coaches Executives and business leaders nationally via in-person and telephonic coaching. He can be contacted 083 227 5153 or info@claudewarner.com. Further information is available on www.claudewarner.com
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